So last night B and I decided to go out and see for ourselves what this famous Medellin nightlife had to offer. From what everyone in the hostel had been saying, we had imagened that every girl in the club would be fucking gorgeous, aided by one of colombia´s domestic products (plastic surgery) and that they would throw their tits in our face as soon as they saw our gringo asses walk in. I mean come on, the guys telling us how hot and easy the girls are, undoubtedly have much less going for them compared to the world´s best, a.k.a. Pikes.
So we paid 20,000 pesos to get in to a club, got a free shot, and started looking around the place. There definitely were some hot girls there but we weren´t overly impressed. At this point we thought our odds would increase if we drank a few more beers and we definitely felt kind of out of place. In hindsight, drinking does not help our spanish game. We spotted the part of the club that had the highest per capita hottness in the club and in our attempt to ignore our uneasy feeling, we went straight for the corner with this group of girls. Before we approached them, we mentioned that they didn´t look like they wanted to interact with anybody outside of their group, it was some kind of girls night or bachlorette party. But sticking true to Brendan´s amp level and persuasion, we went in for the kill. He moved in first to one of the more attractive ones, i´d say an 8, and started talking with her. Meanwhile, i moved in on a 9, and attempted to work my Heimojo in spanish. About 30 seconds into our conversations, we looked at each other and instantly recognized that we we´re crashin hard in our attempts. We left the girls and regrouped to say how our conversations went.
My conversation contained maybe 4-5 sentences, mostly which were spoken by me, and the only thing she said to me was, ¨i have a boyfriend. leave me alone cause there are a lot of other girls here.¨ On that note like a jackass i said, ok, well it was nice to meet you and i enjoyed the talk.
Brendan´s conversation lasted 5 or 6 sentences long, just long enough for the chick to tell him that she had a girlfriend and wasn´t interested! As expected, Brendan tried to get the point across that he was cool with girl on girl action and 3-somes. she more or less responded with, no chance in hell.¨
¨We successfully achieved the most common shut down and the more unexpected I have a girlfriend. But the one thing we can say from this, in the famous word of Brendan P Mulholland at formal 07, ¨the only place we can go is up¨
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5 comments:
haha i´ll leave that one up for debate still. But he could kill 2 birds in one stone and sell them life insurance at the same time which one might actually need down here
Fuckin hilaroius. God i'd love to see Bnut just get shut down all over the place. In another note....heimer take a look at ur lil bro's newest FB picture.
Are you sure Brendan heard the girl right. Novia (Girlfriend) is surprisingly close to Noveea which can be translated as:
(1) The complete absence of physical or sexual attraction to men with a disturbingly large testicle .
(2) Fear of gargantuan salmon fisherman
Either way im sorry it wasn’t in the cards Brendino.
is that my little bro playing defense? and black travis, i will forever refer to you as a dictionary of any and every language so don´t let me down!
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